MEDJUGORJE: MY EXPERIENCE

Robert McCrindle recently returned from a pilgrimage to the International Youth Festival (Mladifest) held in Medjugorje, Bosnia Herzogovina. Here is his account of his trip.

In September 2022, my mom and I were looking for a Catholic young adult group for me. I had graduated from college that May, and had been involved with a group of Catholic students on campus. In September I heard about the Starfish Coffee House, a young adult group at St. Francis of Assisi. I remember my first visit there – it was very crowded, so I decided to sit in the back. Someone spoke about a place in Europe I had never heard of – Medjugorje. I was interested; I had never been to Europe, but I had just joined the Coffee House and didn’t know anyone there very well. An added fact is that I am autistic, which creates a whole host of other challenges. I did not think my parents would want me to travel so far with a bunch of people that I had just met.

In March at another meeting I met Rosie Nelan, one of the leaders at the Coffee House and a passionate Medjugorje enthusiast. We got to talking because I had some interest in going, and wanted to sign up before all the spots were taken. I was quite emotional that night, realizing that I truly did want to go. That evening Rosie gave me a rosary from Medjugorje. That rosary meant a lot to me; to this day it is still my favorite rosary.

I procrastinated and another month went by. At yet another meeting I told Kelly McGuiness I really wanted to go and was now afraid I had missed the deadline. I finally decided to make a move, and told my parents about it. They agreed, and we sent in the deposit. I was on my way to Medjugorje.

On July 22, we flew from JFK to Amsterdam, where we would connect to another flight to Split, Croatia, then a long bus ride to Medjugorje. The previous week had been incredibly stressful for me. I absolutely despise packing, and there was at least one occasion where I just straight-up had a meltdown from being overwhelmed. When we landed in Amsterdam, I could hardly believe it; finally I had made it to Europe. Another flight to Split and we were on our way.

In Split we met Slavanka our tour guide, and a young woman from Boston named Erin. Shortly after leaving the airport, Slavanka decided to lead us all in a rosary. It was beautiful. I had never been inside a moving vehicle with a bunch of other people all praying the rosary. It felt like I didn’t have to hide my faith, I could pray out in the open and no one would judge.

Once we arrived in Medjugorje, we ate a delicious dinner, but my problems started soon after. I rushed to the area behind St. James’ church for evening rosary only to find I was completely alone. I felt like everyone had already abandoned me on my first day! I had a similar experience in college, when I felt abandoned by people I had thought were my friends. Now in Medjugorje, I sent a long rant in the group chat. Rosie read it and came over to where I was sitting to “rescue” me. I didn’t know what God was telling me with Rosie’s actions that night, but I learned that true friends will not abandon you. They will always come to your rescue. Rosie really proved that to me that night. Afterwards, I found Louis and a few other people at a local gelato place, the first of many gelatos to come.

Part 2

On July 22, we went to John F. Kennedy Airport to board the flight to Amsterdam, where we would connect to another flight to Split, a city on the coast in Croatia, before taking a long bus ride to our final destination in Medjugorje. The previous week had been incredibly stressful for me. I am not a good packer – I absolutely despise it, and there was at least one occasion where I just straight-up had a meltdown because of how overwhelming it was. I left with everyone except Rosie – who had already gone on ahead of us – and took a long red-eye flight. When we landed in Amsterdam, I could hardly believe I was actually on European soil. It had finally happened; I made it to Europe. Another flight to Split and we were on our way.

In Split we met Slavanka our tour guide, and a young woman from Boston named Erin. Shortly after we left the airport, Slavanka decided to lead us all in a rosary. It was beautiful. I had never been inside of a moving vehicle with a bunch of other people all praying the rosary. It felt like I didn’t have to hide my faith, I could pray out in the open and no one would judge.

Once we arrived in Medjugorje, we ate a tasty, delicious, filling dinner. Unfortunately, my first problems started soon after. I was worried about being late to the evening rosary. I rushed over to the area behind St. James’ church only to find I was completely by myself. I felt alone, like everyone had already abandoned me and it was only Day 1. I have issues with feeling abandoned; in my senior year of college I found myself completely alone sitting on the beach in Atlantic City, not exactly the safest place. I was eating an overpriced burger, feeling truly abandoned by people I had thought were my friends. Now in Medjugorje, I sent a long rant in the group chat. Rosie read it and came over to where I was sitting to “rescue” me. I didn’t know what God was telling me with Rosie’s actions that night, but I learned that true friends will not abandon you. They will always come over and rescue you, even if you accuse them of abandonment. Rosie really proved that to me that night. Afterwards, still feeling somewhat down, I found Louis and a few other people at a local gelato place, the first of many gelatos to come.

Day 2 started with a very delicious breakfast and some of the best orange juice ever made. The first part of the morning I was still feeling down and a bit afraid, because of my rant the night before. Yet over the course of the morning, I realized that people did not care about it, and treated me as if it had never happened. My spirits lifted immediately, and I felt like I could trust them.

Part 3

Throughout the week, I was able to grow in my faith, my prayer life, and my devotion to God in ways I could not have imagined. From attending daily Mass, to climbing both Apparition Hill and Cross Mountain twice that week (once even barefoot!) Seeing people from every race and nation all coming together to pray to God, to ask the Blessed Virgin’s intercessions us was incredibly powerful. Realizing all of us have something in common there showed us that unity could be achieved with prayer. That’s another thing – to be able to pray in public and not be judged for it was incredible to me. Here in our secular world, it is weird to pray in public for many reasons, from the fact that few are religious any more, to being afraid of offending someone, even to legal reasons preventing us from doing so. But in Medjugorje, it’s normal. People won’t look at you strangely. Everyone there is incredibly holy, which makes it easy to pray. In fact there were outdoor confessions, so it was normal to go to confession. One of my favorite things was to sit or kneel somewhere and just pray the rosary – once the Divine Mercy Chaplet. A few places were in front of the Blessed Virgin statue inside St. James’ church, in the adoration chapel, in front of the statue of Mary behind the church, and even at the gravesite of Fr. Slavko Barbarić, asking for his intercession. Simply praying in these places truly helped me feel God’s presence. One time during a rosary I even felt what I believe might have been a call to do something.

Medjugorje was filled with many powerful, moving moments. Here is one example:

On the second night after the procession of Mary, nightly adoration started behind St. James’. I had attended adoration the previous evening and found it to be a great way to connect with God. However, during that particular night, there was a deliverance. I had never heard or witnessed a deliverance before, and I can tell you it’s something I never want to hear again. There was a blood-curdling scream from a woman who had a demon trying to exit her body. I realized what was happening, and before I knew it, I was having massive empathy for this poor woman. Hearing the screams was a lot for me to handle. I started to get scared and emotional, trying my best to focus on the body of Jesus to help her. Rosie and Gina must have noticed, because they turned to comfort me. I started to cry, with tears running down my face, but they were there when I needed them. Both helped me and assured me that everything would be okay. Gina told me to pray multiple Hail Mary’s to help the woman expel the demons. Rosie showed me and told me about God’s love, and said in that moment, God was pleased with me for having such empathy for that woman.

They helped me realize that everything would be all right, that God’s peace and love will overpower any sort of evil and hate in this world. God will win in the end. The following night, there were more deliverances, but this time I was prepared, and prayed several Hail Mary’s to help the souls of these people.

Part 4

One morning, I had another powerful experience, this time on Apparition Hill. Louis, Erin and I decided to return to the Hill for no other reason than to go there again. At the base, Louis and I made the decision to climb the hill barefoot. During the ascent, I kept asking Jesus to give me the strength to make it up there without shoes on. With every step, I asked Christ for strength, even with the sharp rocks below. Thanks to Hin, I made it to the top along with Louis and Erin. At the top of that big area we started a little bible study we had planned. We chose the three accounts of the Transfiguration because it felt appropriate given the location at the top of the hill, much like Jesus when he was transfigured. As we studied, I watched the others who had climbed on their own. Once again, I saw every nation of people gathered together on Apparition Hill to pray to our Blessed Mother and her Son. It made me want to stay in Medjugorje forever. I did not want to leave, to return to anywhere that did not love God as much as the people did there.

Medjugorje was so holy. I remember trying to get that same feeling back when I returned home, only to fail each time, except for a Mass on the beach that first Sunday after I got home. Rosie had told me that I was going to feel that way, that it was impossible to truly feel the same way as I did over there, on account of how holy Medjugorje is. I guess both Louis and Erin had the same realization; I remember on that hill, one of them said that perhaps our mission in going there was to eventually return home and share all the fruits of Medjugorje with everyone we know. That is what we have to do.

One last experience happened on our final full day there. On Sunday, there was a sunrise Mass being held at the summit of Cross Mountain. That meant arriving super early to get a good spot. This was a challenge as the festival had ended the night before – which was entirely amazing by the way – and we had stayed up quite late. But I wanted to go, so after about 30 minutes of sleep, we all took a taxi to the foot of Cross Mountain at about 2:30am. At that time there were already tons and tons of people looking to climb, yet we were able to find a back way up the mountain. I needed a brief break as my heart rate was rising, and in that moment, there were only four of our group there together along with nature. Looking up we saw all the stars shining brightly with the Milky Way right above us! Just resting there I learned another lesson, that God is all around us. Other than a church, what better place to find God than in the very nature He created. As great as it is to be surrounded by nature, it is so much better when you are with friends. We sat for 10 minutes before continuing the climb.

Conclusion

After climbing to the summit of Cross Mountain for a final sunrise Mass, we eventually reached the top, where we were greeted by a large concrete cross and hundreds of people in sleeping bags, many of them still asleep. We found a nice flat surface where we just laid down. Being up there was simply amazing. I don’t know what it was about just laying there, whether the fact that we were so sleep deprived or God giving us His graces, but we had a great time just waiting. Whether it was someone tossing us a small pillow, or us taking the worst group selfie ever, or looking up to find shooting stars, we were truly blessed to be there. Sunrise came, and we experienced one of the greatest Masses I have ever attended. One thing I will always remember is that at the exact moment of receiving the Holy Eucharist, the sun appeared from behind the mountains, clearly a sign from God, and the perfect setting to receive the body of our Lord Jesus Christ.

The holiest moment of the day was yet to come later, as we experienced an apparition of the Blessed Virgin. There is honestly something so special about being not 100 feet away from the Virgin Mary. It made me stop being jealous of other people’s experiences in life; how many can say they were that close to our Blessed Mother Mary? We experienced her love firsthand, and it was the perfect ending to a most blessed and wonderful pilgrimage.

There is only one negative thing I can say about this pilgrimage. It is the fact that Satan will try to attack once you leave Medjugorje. He will try to destroy all you have worked for. All of us experienced it in some form, and I still have experiences to this day. Yet if one is under attack, it means you are doing something right, and God will win in the end.

The gifts I have received from the pilgrimage have been amazing. I finally found a job after a year of searching. I feel closer to God and truly want to live out His word. I pray the rosary every day, and say grace before meals. I have started to love the Mass and get emotional at the transubstantiation. I have found friends I can truly trust who will not judge me for who I am, autism and all. Most important, I’ve learned to trust in our God who is good and will give me everything and more that I need. As I’ve gotten further away from my time in Medjugorje, I’ve started to struggle with sins returning, but I know God is always there for me, teaching me every moment of my life, and He will win over evil. There is no need to fear when trusting in God. The devil may try to make you anxious and afraid, but God will protect and love you, and eventually you can join Him in the Kingdom of Heaven.

And that is why you should go to Medjugorje.